Q&A: My Son Gets Nervous When I Watch – Please Help.

Playing in front of other people can be very intimidating for young athletes. While it is a normal for a child to be nervous when they start a new sport, it can become a troublesome and chronic issue. Concerned parent, Jenny, poses this common theme and looks for advice for her son who gets nervous when she watches him play. Sports Psychologist Dr. Patrick Cohn offers the following valuable advice.

Jenny Writes: Here is my question, my son plays better hockey when I am not there. When I asked him about this he finally admitted that his dad and I make him nervous. We love watching him and feel terrible about this. We always try to be positive and give him some pointers. Maybe because my husband played our son is trying to be like him. What can I do to help him?

Answer: Your son is worried about what others think about his performance especially when you are watching. We call this social approval in our work. Kids get distracted by thinking too much about what others might be thinking about them. You can try to watch the game where your son doesn’t see you. Or, you can come later when he is already in the flow of the game and might not notice you. But this does not address the real issue!

You should talk to him about why he gets nervous when his parents watching. Is he afraid to let you down? Is he scared to make mistakes in front of you? You might find out that he doesn’t want to disappoint you. You should emphasize that who is in the stands is not important and what is important is his role is on the team and the task at hand. For example, he needs to focus on following the puck or sticking to the game plan. Also, discuss how to play for himself instead of playing for others (or to not disappoint others).

Editor’s Note: Thank to Dr. Patrick Cohn for this advice.

Written by admin · Filed Under Parenting

Let’s Play Hockey Expo 2009 – Reek Out

This article is part of the ongoing Let’s Play Hockey Expo 2009 series presented by DailySportsDeal.com. The Let’s Play Hockey Expo is the largest consumer hockey expo in the U.S. In this segment, Executive Editor TK Stohlman interviews former NHL player Pat Verbeek, founder of Beek's Reek Out.

Reek Out solves the age old problem of dealing with smelling sports equipment. Pat also offers parents some excellent advice to help their players enjoy the hockey experience. For more information on Beek's Reek Out, visit their website at www.reekout.com.

Written by CaresEditor · Filed Under Parenting

Four Ways to Get Crossed off the Coach’s List

The centerpiece of every recruiting war room is “the list” which is essentially the official recruiting board that will be analyzed and vetted exhaustively by the entire coaching staff until the recruiting class is finalized. There are many reasons that coaches move players up the list or remove them altogether. Here are four key reasons why players get removed.

Academics- A thorough academic history is very helpful in determining the staying power a recruit’s name has on the list. The more prepared academically in regards to fulfilling core course requirements and core GPA and the better the report card the better chance the prospect has to remain on the list. Even if a recruit has struggled in some of the core classes, it does not mean they will be immediately removed. However, if the coach is unable to gain access to proper documentation or notification that a recruit has intentions of improving their academic standing by taking summer school, or through some other means, the student-athlete will not be given the benefit of the doubt. Do not ever hide or hold back the transcript. It is a red flag and can earn your nameplate a spot in the dreaded box of discarded recruits. Even if you are struggling, show the coach you are aware of the problem and have a plan to fix it. Make your academic information easily accessible. This will also give a college coach time to work with a recruit to put a plan together to stay on “the list.”

Evaluation - Of course a significant portion of the decision to keep or remove a prospects name from the list hinges on the recruits athletic ability. With that in mind, make sure to have a quality highlight tape and at least one full game tape available for all coaches (college coaches watch highlight tapes to decide if they want to watch a game tape!) This film provides the area coach ammunition to defend an athlete’s place on the list. Without the film, a recruit is far more likely to be removed.

3rd Party Evaluations- An evaluation by a trusted third party can go a long way towards keeping a prospect’s name on the board, because it serves as a reference. Again, as an area coach puts his initial list together to bring before the rest of the staff, he is basically gathering evidence to state his case. This third party evaluation can add to the support and help the area coach defend the prospect.

Parents! - Believe it or not, a parent can be a main reason for a prospect getting dropped from the list. I recall one year that we were recruiting a top player when we received a comment from the high school coach that the father might be a problem. Apparently the father was questioning coaching, challenging the conditioning, complaining to other parents, etc. We watched the father (almost as closely as the athlete) and ended up removing the recruit from the list because of the father’s actions.

Editor’s Note: Thank you to the NCSA for this valuable article.

Written by admin · Filed Under Recruiting

Q&A: How to Select Coaches For Your Association

Selecting a coach for your youth sporting association is the first step in creating a successful program. In the following response to a reader’s question on this subject, Founder and Directer of flexxCoach, Jim Johnson, provides valuable input on how to select outstanding coaches.

Ed asks: Our association is starting the process of considering our coaching options for 2009-2010. Do you have suggestions as to the criteria we should use when selecting a coach, everything from resume to questions to ask? Also, when doing their performance reviews, I assume that you can follow a good business outline. But what else?

Answer: I believe it is important to look at the coach’s hockey knowledge and their ability to teach the fundamental skills of the sport. Communication is one of the most important qualities that a coach can posses. I would ask the coach to put together a practice plan to be reviewed by the Coaching Director or whomever is responsible for hiring the coaches. This will provide a snapshot of their organizational skills, their knowledge base and their ability to plan for the players development. I always feel that an essential component to selecting coaches is the evaluation process and to get feedback from parents, players and other coaches within the organization.

Editor’s Note: Special thanks to Jim Johnson for his input.

Written by admin · Filed Under Parenting